Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Inspiration
Hey there, friend! Glad you could make it. Been awhile, huh? I bet you thought I was dead. Truth is, that’s what I wanted you to think! It was all part of an elaborate life insurance fraud, and now, I’m fleeing Earth with my group of alien banditos with at least $16 hard cash and a half empty can of pringles. Just try and stop me.
I guess I don’t really need to explain myself, because you know well enough at this point that you could probably sing along: Procrastination, no comics, delayed comics, wahey! Video games, getting sick, other projects, wahey! It goes without saying that any ambition I once had to provide comics and updates in a timely manner is gone, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care. So I’d like to take a moment to discuss the word of the day: inspiration.
The inspiration to come up with an idea is always alive and well in me. I’m more than happy to crack open a wordpad and jot down a script for a comic, or write down any thoughts I don’t feel like sharing with the world, or even work on something that has more meaning than a badly drawn cartoon on the internet, which will be seen by a number of people you could count on both hands. But the problem for me is, holding onto that inspiration can be difficult. Sometimes, it passes before I can make anything of it. Worse is when I see the long road ahead of me, and realize that it would take a lot more time and effort than just a couple of words.
Take this explanation, for example. I like doing things like this. I love to type, and I love to rant, but this stuff is trivial. Even for how shit the quality of these comics are, it still takes a fair amount of time and dedication to squat one out and add dialogue bubbles. But, like these long-winded typing sessions I do from time to time, all I need to do is start on one and I can see it through. I just need that first push–that inspiration, as it were–but for a long time, I didn’t have that.
You know what is inspiring, though? Hopping on TeamSpeak with a bunch of people you haven’t talked to in years, and having them immediately remember you based on what you did. That’s where I am, now. And that’s why I have some new comics to upload.
#012: The Short Cut (Halloween 2013)
It’s only late January. Halloween is still topical, right? To be honest, I never actually came up with a name for the comic. The file name was “Halloween 2013,” and as you can tell, I kind of scrambled to make it. Another fun fact: this was the short version of the comic. I had a longer version (The Long Cut) planned, in which Metal XII beheads other characters from Photon Art before finally concluding on the line of “I guess I got A-HEAD of myself,” and a comical tap-dancing scene, but as you could guess, this was way too much effort for such a stupid joke. The Long Cut remains in the graveyard of unfinished ideas, but at least it finally gave me a name for the Halloween 2013 comic.
Also, I just realized that comic #12 wasn’t some wacky throwback. It’s just a number.
#013: Arks Economics
The Arks Economy can be a bit confusing, at times. Why do they impose a 5% tax on everything bartered between its members? Why is cake so expensive? Why is there a shifty guy who pays you to run Time Attacks? And why, above everything else, do they allow someone so god damn incompetent at their job, to a point that they offer no refund nor compensation for failed results, to run a service that is integral to the Arks goal of exploring and colonizing various planets. If you are unfamiliar with him, he is the devil incarnate.
I’ve often questioned where Klotho gets the money to pay thousands of Arks for running a simulation. This comic expresses my theory, and honestly? It makes sense. So does my theory that the Arks are the villains of the PSO2 continuity, actually. The world is not yet aware of my genius, but I’ll show them. And then they’ll laugh. And I’ll laugh. Then we’ll run some TAs.
#014: Tubular Turnpike
Okay, look.
I understand what Sega was trying to do. They wanted to do what most good video games do: create variety between stages. So, naturally, we had to have an industrial, city-esque stage in Sonic Adventure 2. And for what it’s worth, City Escape was handled surprisingly well. Yes, the loop-de-loop down that one building didn’t make much sense, but it wasn’t so bad.
Cue Radical Highway.
I don’t know what kind of sick fuck thought that this was a good outlet for transportation, but it’s not. There are bottomless pits, loop-de-loops everywhere, speed boosters and ramps, and to top it all off, the damn place is still under construction. What exactly are they trying to accomplish with Radical Highway, other than to build a playground for fast moving anthropomorphic hedgehogs? In short, why isn’t my Sonic game realistic? I’m going to complain about this on the internet, posthaste!
As always, I can’t promise frequent updates, but for once, I can give you guys something new. As long as at least one person enjoys these, I can always say “I’ll get around to making a new one.” Infrequent as they are, I have no intent on quitting any time soon.
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Self-Parody
#011: Disqualified
I actually finished this one a few days ago, but forgot to upload it. Go, me! Other titles for the comic include “I’m stupid” and “Dodging bullets,” because the only reason I made this one was to avoid becoming a parody of my own jokes. We can’t have that now, can we?
This comic isn’t a replacement for that last Dark Flow comic. I just need to get around to making it, and we all know how that’s going to end. Fortunately, once it does, I can move on to a few comics about various other games that have been conceived, but not made. You probably know the list by now: Skyrim, Mass Effect, Twilight Princess, etc.
Fortunately, I have time to kill, so I think I’ll tackle MS Paint right now. And by that, I mean right after I check what’s going on in Animal Crossing.
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
It’s Happening, Again.
#010: Mag Finds Dark Flow (Part 2)
No drawn-out exposition today. The joke should be simple enough: PSU is gone now, and so is the Dark Flow that Mag actually had. No refunds. Much like the roadblock that prevented me from finishing the Photon Art Christmas Carol when I intended to, I’m now suffering from an obnoxious cold that has drained all of my energy today.
I’ll try not to let this get in the way of the third and final Dark Flow comic. I guess I’ll have to wait and see how I feel tomorrow.
Monday, April 8, 2013
Mag Finds Dark Flow (Part 1)
#009: Mag Finds Dark Flow (Part 1)
I’ve played with the idea of Mag “getting” a Dark Flow multiple times before. I’ve come up with multiple different scenarios where he technically wins, but only through silly means such as this. This is the first of multiple comics I intend to do in which Mag manages to acquire that long-sought Sword. As you’ve probably guessed by now, he won’t come out on top in any of them, but Phantasy Star is a game where every victory counts. Even the unexpected ones.
This also covers something that I wanted to do a separate comic for, but never got around to it. When an enemy dies, what exactly determines whether or not it drops its “part”? For example, if you kill a Booma, who is stopping you from tearing off its arm and turning it into the weapon variant? Are those hundreds of other Boomas I killed too damaged to salvage an arm from? And what about Vanda Claws? Pan Arm Arms? Hildebear Heads? Ill Gill Testament– okay, you know what, you probably get the idea.
I guess I could be overthinking this. Through it all, it’s just the RNG, and that’s how loot-based games work best. If enemy part weapons were so easy to obtain, they would probably have to compensate by making them horrible. Most of them already are, but still. It’s just one of those things that has always bothered me in a subtle way, and something that can easily be made fun of because of how little it makes sense from a realistic standpoint.
Sunday, April 7, 2013
Mag Finally Wins
Heads up, losers!
Okay, I didn’t mean to call you losers. I’m sorry. Please don’t leave.
Now that I have your attention, though, I’d like to say (for the sake of making a promise, and giving incentive to keep it) that I’m planning on making three very special comics, to give closure to the Schtserv Chapters. In them, Mag will finally triumph over his greatest nemesis: The RNG. Still no word on trumping Dudu, Alterazgoug, Karin Xii, Good Mag, Shadow the Hedgehog, birds, Amaury or roller coaster height restriction boards (you must be this tall to– okay, yeah, you probably already got the joke) but it’s a start.
My estimate is tomorrow, so expect to see them by mid-August.